In an effort to learn more about R&B star Akon, who is is performing tonight at the Kitchener Memorial Auditorium, I consulted Wikipedia (which is an infallible bastion of truth, and don't let anyone tell you different). Here is an assortment of random factoids that should get you better acquainted with Akon:
1. His name is not Acorn. I stand corrected.
2. Apparently his full name is Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam. I consulted the footnotes on Wikipedia wondering what evidence could back up this fact. It cited an episode of The Ellen Degeneres Show, which is also an infallible bastion of truth (and a bastion of middle-aged women dancing poorly), and don't let anyone tell you different.
3. Akon was born in 1973. Or 1977. Or 1981. He won't say. "The only thing I hide is my age... before I lie to you, I'd rather say nothing," he told a VIBE reporter.
4. He spent five years in jail. Or perhaps not. Although he sings a lot about serving hard time for being the ringleader of a car theft operation (many of his songs begin with the clanking of a jail cell), an investigation by The Smoking Gun suggests that "Akon's ad nauseum claims about his criminal career and resulting prison
time have been, to an overwhelming extent, exaggerated, embellished, or
wholly fabricated."
5. Akon is rumoured to have three wives. So his chart-topping claim to be "Mr. Lonely" is evidently a bit off-the-mark.
6. Akon apparently owns a diamond mine in South Africa, which explains the bling. He denies the rumours that the mine produces so-called blood-diamonds.
7. In April 2007, it was reported that Akon engaged in on-stage simulated sex with Danah (Deena) Alleyne, a preacher's fifteen-year-old daughter. Oopsie!
Apparently Akon has also released a lot of music and collaborated with dozens of other artists. He sells lots of albums and has legions of fans, yadda yadda. Hmm... perhaps "yadda yadda" should become part of his middle name. It would fit right in!

